A lot of married couples complain about their sex life. Complaints mostly revolve around the frequency and quality of these experiences. Simply said – there is little sex and it’s not good. But it wasn’t always like this…so what happened? Why do people drift apart?
The honeymoon sets up unrealistic expectations
The honeymoon period may have been your sexual peak, and it started going downhill from there. Sometimes people expect things to always be the same. Preferences change, times change, and people change. Appearances change. Men complain about their wives’ saggy breasts, and women complain about their husband’s beer bellies. There is a certain lack of physical attraction. You must realize this is the same person you married – less the perky tits or flat stomach.
A lot of psychologists and laymen will tell you to “spend more time together.” No need to repeat that here, least of all because that’s only part of the problem. You could be spending hours together, like if both of you work from home, and still be having sex rarely, if at all. To create an inviting atmosphere, people need to actually listen to each other instead of just waiting for their turn to speak. Good communication will create comfort, bringing back the sensations and the great sex you once had.
When you settle down with someone, things can get boring. The couple will start making less time for sex, consciously or not. The husband will tend to turn the TV on and doze off when he’s finished. The wife will be thinking about something more useful to do than sex and start refusing. We have lack of patience here. Sex starts taking more time to stay as good as it once was as you get used to each other. Try new things to spice it up, like a new position.